Stephen Colbert congratulates Israel on new national bird and kosher giraffes

As many of you may have heard, Israel recently selected a new national bird: the Hoopoe, or “Duchifat” in Hebrew. I have no idea what the logic was behind this choice, since the Hoopoe is specified as unclean in the Bible and therefore not kosher, but bird fans say the Hoopoe is a kind, monogamous creature that takes good care of its kids. Sounds like a lot of Jewish mothers I know.

Despite its kind nature, the Hoopoe apparently has some disgusting habits, and Stephen Colbert of the Colbert Report had a lot to say about it. He suggested that Israel adopt the Hoopoe’s defense tactics on the Golan Heights: squirting fecal matter at intruders. He also congratulated the Jews on a new addition to the kosher menu: giraffe. Yum yum.